Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
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Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
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and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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