No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
nutella sex= disaster
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
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You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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