Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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