I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize