Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
