Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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