i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize