He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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