What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Randomize
