You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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