I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
