My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
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