sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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