woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was an excessively violent trivia night
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Randomize