dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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