I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
