I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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