fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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