so explain again why im purple
no
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
