dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
