Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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