i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
well, you know. whores of a feather.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
