Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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