Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize
