If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Just cropdusted the office
i can't believe i had my finger in that
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
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