Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
