how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
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