she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize
