Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize