when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
you never un-have a 4some
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
