...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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