I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
