Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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