operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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