well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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