sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
