I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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