HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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