Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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