Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize