His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Randomize
