is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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