i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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