He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize