I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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