check it out our google latitudes are spooning
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Randomize
