Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
my poor anus
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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