i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Randomize
