He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.