Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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