so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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